'Good Fren' and I went to East Coast Park for an afternoon of cycling and blading this week. I can't blade. I was on the bicycle.

A few weeks ago, I hopped out of the car to grab something from Cold Storage while he waited. On my way back, I ran to the car to avoid oncoming traffic. That's when 'Good Fren' commented that it might have been the first time he had seen me run?!

I must be such a nuah partner because even my partner of 3 years doesn't know what I look like running. In any case, I will have to be more althletic soon.

Speaking of 'soon', my old friend, who has emigrated to the US, sent us a parcel!


Ohhh.... What do we have here?


She knitted these for us!!


Blinky and Tiger got rather excited about the lavendar which she had packed in the parcel. She said lavendar keeps bugs away.

And the card demonstrates her rather optimistic imagery of our upcoming endeavor. As you can see I look really young and the sun is visible and shining.

After a long process (almost 9 months), 'Good Fren' and I have something to announce. Nope... the 9 months do not suggest that we have just given birth. Rather, 'Good Fren' and I will be making our way to the UK to further our studies very soon.

And yes, this is why we bought some clothes for the cats earlier. However, the plans have changed a little since. Initially, we had wanted to go over first, while Blinky and Tiger were to 'serve out' their 6-month quarantine in Singapore, and to join us after the coldest bits of winter had passed. I had imagined riding the bicycle leisurely along cobble stone streets, zipping past 800 year old buildings, with Blinky in the basket in the front. Wind in his pulled back ears and Teresa Teng in mine.

However, a couple of issues have cropped up along the way.

Firstly, blood has to be drawn from them and tested 6 months before they fly over. This proved to be awfully difficult and futile. The Vet, the Helper, 'Good Fren' and I were all over the tiny room, trying to hold the cats, distract the cats and venipuncture (is this a verb?) the cats.

Vet managed to draw like 2ml from Tiger, and none from Blinky.
No blood, no test, no quarantine, no travel.

After a few violent reactions, Vet suggested for them go under General Anaesthesia so as to draw blood successfully. Though they have both gone through it at least once earlier in their lives, there is no guarantee that they will wake up everytime.

Secondly, Blinky and Tiger are elderly cats. They are about 60 years old in human years, and parts of their bodies are showing signs of breaking down. Ain't no spring kitties as before. This makes me very concerned about the impact of the flight and the eventual cold weather.

Lastly, by the time they get there, we would have completed at least half of the course. So it will not make much sense for them to fly back to Singapore only a few months later, should we decide to come back after the course. That's too much flying for 60 year old cats.

So tentatively, we have 2 options.

(A) Get a friend to apartment-sit and cat-sit
In this way, Blinky and Tiger do not have to make adjustments to a new environment, only to a relatively new 'handler'.

We have spoken to a friend (who shall not be named, just in case he feels pressurised =P). We shall know his final decision tomorrow.

(B) Move Blinky and Tiger to a cattery
While this is a common solution, my guess is that Blinky and Tiger will not take it well because there is just too much to get used to. Tiger usually cries for a few days when he moves to a new space. And because they are rather large cats, the cattery may be too small for them to chase each other.

Most importantly, I think the presence of other cats and animals will cause some anxiety. I can imagine the other sulky kitties taunting Blinky and Tiger,


Option (B) is definitely not ideal, but we've got to have a Plan B. I was told by the cattery owner to regularly send over worn t-shirts so that they can smell 'Good Fren' and me, and feel comforted. =_=

And... at this point, it's a good time for weeping.
My cats and I have never been separated for more than a month in the past 10 years.

I've been thinking about this for a while and get really confused each time I try.


If you try to think about it, you will realise that it is not an easy question to answer. And depending on how much time you have spent reading local online content and/or watching locally produced arts/films etc, you may realise that your instinctive reaction is to be reply to the question with sarcasm.

While surfing randomly online about Hu Jin Tao, I came across what he has stated for his country men in 2006. A set of guiding principles called '八荣八耻'.

• Love the country; do it no harm.
• Serve the people; never betray them.
• Follow science; discard superstition.
• Be diligent; not indolent.
• Be united, help each other; make no gains at other's expense.
• Be honest and trustworthy; do not sacrifice ethics for profit.
• Be disciplined and law-abiding; not chaotic and lawless.
• Live plainly, work hard; do not wallow in luxuries and pleasures.

Some may find it 'propaganda-ish', but minimally, there is elucidation. There is a reference point. I do not think 'propaganda' ought to be seen as a symbol of communism and/or bad historical reference. I think it is merely another form of mass communication.

How many people actually remember the points made in each year's National Day Rally (NDR) speeches? There are just too many points to remember in each speech. And after tens of NDR speeches, the to-do and not-to-do list just gets too long.

In terms of details, the 八荣八耻 is one level more than say the national pledge. And in terms from perspective, it is written for the individual citizen, and not for the people as a whole, nor for the country. While this may appear to be merely communication aesthetics, I believe that it is sound in its intention because I have come to realise that many people are unable to differentiate between the individual, the collective, the State, the Nation etc. They are also unable to phantom that an issue/policy could have different pros/cons at each level. Hence, any communication needs to minimally pitched to the individual for a start.

So, the easiest thing to do in an attempt to answer the question of "What makes a Good Singaporean?" is to borrow other people's template. =))

Here is my attempt. All changes are in blue. The bits which I am unsure of, I left them in ???.

1. Love the country, one another & the FTs; do it/them no harm
2. Serve the people; Do not resist getting married, giving birth and helping others to give birth
3. Follow ???; discard still water
   
4. Be educated & employed; not drop-out & unemployed
5. Be united, help each other; ???
6. Be clever; ???
7. Be disciplined and law-abiding; not chaotic and lawless
8. Live the 5Cs (or more), work hard, maintain worklife balance; ???

My birthday was not celebrated much this year due to energy and resource constraints. We have much on our minds.

Fortunately, a 'brother' put together an August birthday for the group. A FEW drinks later... We almost forgot to take a picture.

I had to blank out their eyes because... I had to... HAHA...

I get rather stressed out everytime I hang out with this group because they can hold their liquor very well. While I like to drink, my body doesn't hold up as much as it used to as compared to my younger days. And I happen to be the youngest in this group. I is lousy.

So what did 'Good Fren' get me this year? Nothing as yet.
Though I'm not sure whether paying for the CFA exam fees is counted as a birthday present.

I really want the colon irrigation package.
If I do get to go for it, I'll so blog about the experience lor!!!
I am particularly excited about the concept of internal cleansing, and I had a hard time arguing with Angry Doc about its pros and cons.
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On the topic of cleansing... 'Good Fren' and I 'cleansed' our wardrobe yesterday.

Because everyone accumulates loads of stuff over time, it's essential that the wanted and unwanted in one's life (physical spaces such as home, car etc, physiological spaces such as outside and inside of the body, and mental spaces such as the mind) are sorted out every once in a while, so as to keep healthy and nimble. This will take time and effort, and sometimes confuses due to a lack of technique and/or discipline. Nonetheless, lugging the unwanted around everyday just means suppressing the potential of the wanted.

Ok, back to our little attempt yesterday.
We sorted out the unwanted clothes and shoes, then divided them into 2 categories, i.e. (A) to throw away (coz too yucky for anyone to wear anymore) and (B) to recycle.

Yes, I gave up many pairs of shoes... Now I only have around 10 pairs... GOSH!! Is that even possible?!! =)))

This afternoon, we brought the stuff to the Salvation Army at 500 Upper Bukit Timah Road.


And place the stuff in the donation bin.


Here you see 'Good Fren' lifting the box of clothing into the Donation Bin.


I'm sure some of you have seen the Channel U TV programme where Kym Ng goes to people's homes with loads of junk to help clean them out. I think it is a great programme because it helps to provide an excuse for some to clean out their homes in a humorous manner. And most times, it's almost impossible for a family member to throw away even 1 small item. Hence, it may be easier for Kym Ng to come along and do it. But of course, depending on how bad the situation is, such an attempt may turn out even worse.

To put it lightly, one can call such behaviour 'laziness'. To put it less lightly, it's compulsive hoarding, i.e. a symptom of poor mental health.

So, if you wanna clean out your life... Do remember you can recycle some items. Drop them off at the Salvation Army, drop them off in the donation bins. You can find them at the 2 categories of location:

The Salvation Army's premises:

• THQ, 20 Bishan Street 22 (open car park)
• The Salvation Army Hope Centre, 7 Upper Changi Road North (beside the Family Thrift Store)
• The Haven, 350 Pasir Panjang Road
• Praisehaven, 500 Upper Bukit Timah Road
• 309 Upper Serangoon Road

Public venues:

• Blk 79 Marine Parade Central (Opposite Faith Community Baptist Church, FCBC Touchcentre)
• IMH 10 Buangkok View (Car Park A)
• IMM Open Carpark, (beside the security guardhouse, unloading bay)

Back to simple entries...

Read this news article on 'Don't Codeswitch to Singlish, please"?

According to the chairman of the Spoke Good English Movement, switching to Singlish when you think the other party is more the Singlish type is condescending and does not help the latter to improve his English.

I find the explanation rather contradicting to my experience.
I realise that if you speak to people in Singlish within the work context, 'educated' colleagues tend to give you less respect. Some colleagues may think you are not 'up to the mark'. If you swear in hokkien at work, lagi worse. Jialat oredi... You must be uneducated. Tsk Tsk Tsk. I once said '(something) kee lan ah!' during an office recreational event, and a couple of female senior officers went into shock and exclaimed,"Haiyoh... Haiyoh..." They obviously knew what it meant... HAHAHAHAHA!! I can still remember their facial expressions very clearly!!

On the other hand, my Singlish has become so good that people at support level usually open up really fast. A customer's clerk recently revealed that she was chummy (e.g. tells me stuff about her bosses) with me coz I was 'same level' as her, i.e. a support staff.

In view of the association of proper English with higher education and snobbery, I agree with the English Teacher who was quoted in the article that sometimes one switches to Singlish in consideration of the other party's feelings.

Like the other day, we got a plumber to come over to fix a clog in the loo. The plumber spoke halting English and offered a couple of options. To help him evaluate the options, 'Good Fren' asked,"So what are the implications of if we choose Solution A?" As soon as I heard 'Good Fren' say 'implications', my heart jumped. I didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable, and was surprised at 'Good Fren's choice of words coz his Singlish and dialects are more powerful than mine. He probably was still in 'work mode'. And sure enough, there was dead silence. 'Good Fren' then rephrased his question in Mandarin/Singlish.

What's the point of avoiding codeswitching to the point of communication breakdown? Language is a tool, not a badge of social status. Who is making it the latter?

Sidenote to self: If my intention is to be considerate towards others, then perhaps I should watch my cursing in front people whose skin will crawl or have to cover their own/kids' ears whenever someone in the vicinity says 'fuck', 'cheebye' or 'knn'!! =)))

IOC is seeking investigation of some of these girls' ages.

Some believe that a few of them may be only 14 years old. Bloggers, such as Stryde Hax and Billypan, have found (deleted) information on some of these girls online which suggests that their ages are less than 16 years old. Many others who have used online search engines to search for information on the chinese gymnasts have also found similar information.
Watch this CNN video called 'Bloggers on a Mission'.
The embedding function doesn't work properly.

I wonder why there should be a minimum age criteria. This article explains it and more, though the video claims it because younger bodies are lighter and more flexible, and so can manage more 'tricks'.

"Age falsification has been a problem in gymnastics since the 1980s after the minimum age was raised from 14 to 15 to protect young athletes from serious injuries. The minimum age was raised to its current 16 in 1997.

North Korea was barred from the 1993 world championships after FIG officials discovered that Kim Gwang Suk, the gold medalist on uneven bars in 1991, was listed as 15 for three years in a row. Romania admitted in 2002 that several gymnasts' ages had been falsified, including Olympic medalists Gina Gogean and Alexandra Marinescu.

Even China's own Yang Yun, a double bronze medalist in Sydney, said during an interview aired on state broadcaster China Central Television that she was 14 in 2000."

So Singov has spoken on the marriage and parenthood. I am surprised that the Make-Baby package is merely incremental, and have started to believe that I have misread Singov's intentions.

MATERNITY LEAVE & ITS DISCONTENT
Regardless of how limited the package is, I have already heard from at least 2 single men in the public service that they are not pleased with the 4th month of maternity leave. This means if they happen to be paired up a married and/or ready-to-mother female officer, they will have to cover for them for at least 1/3 of the year should they decide to pop. And sometimes, they pop one after another.

The mother's absence is said to be at least 1/3 of the year because they usually extend the maternity leave with their own leave prior to the birth and with no-pay leave after the official maternity leave ends. In effect, they can be absent for 6 months or more. Guess who's doing their work while they are at home breastfeeding their new babies?

Before all mothers get riled up at the above, there is nothing wrong at the individual level per se. It's just that such a State-sanctioned arrangement poses pain to others who do not necessary care about other people's babies. While the employers get 'official compensation' for the mothers' absence in some ways, the covering officer does not. As mentioned in my earlier entry, the Singaporean Baby is an expensive one and requires many parties' cooperation for it to be created and brought up. However, not all parties have equal or any say to have or not have the baby.

In simple everyday terms, this means if your colleague is having a baby or babies, you as part of her work team have no choice but to lap it up and cover her. Are you gonna get paid more for doing so? Depends on your boss. Can you say no to her bab(ies)? Unlikely. Hence, it is inevitable that some covering officers may not be too happy about their colleagues popping, especially one after another.

Solution? Ready-to-mother types ought to partner each other. Cover for each other. Work out their child-bearing schedules together. In Jun 2008, I'll have mine, then I'll be back by Dec 2008, you can have yours in Mar 2009, then you will be back by Sep 2009, then I can have my 2nd one by Dec 2009, and I'll be back by May 2010, and you can have your 2nd one around Sep 2010 and get back by Jan 2011. Then we take a rest a little. By Sep 2011, I'll have my 3rd one, and will be back by Jan 2012 (cannot take so much no-pay leave coz it's expensive having kids), then you can go for your 3rd one by Aug 2012 and be back by Dec 2012. Then we should be done with child-bearing.

Total no. of months since 1st birth = 54 months, i.e. 3.5 years
Total no. of months with both officers on duty = 27 months (50%)

Imagine how productive that will be. Hence, it will make more sense to pair the ready-to-be mother types with a no-uterus/unlikely-to-be mother type. And I know female officers who serve out their bonds in this child-bearing manner, and still get promoted because they are deemed much more valuable than their peers.

Apart from fundamental value differences between the parent-types and the non-parent types, such policies are likely to further segregate these 2 groups at work. I'm sure it will affect morale and teamwork.

As for the private sector, the impact will be less because of the bottom-line. If you do not contribute over an extended period, out you go. Hence, do be prepared to 'pay more' for your bab(ies) in terms of forgoing career opportunities. But of course, if the female is very exceptional, like those in the public service, special arrangements can be made.

Some have said to me, "You see... Heng you are female, since you cannot stop others from having kids, you ought to join them! 不生，白不生 leh! So that you don't lose out mah!"

I hope they were joking. Coz having kids should not become a government grant buffet.


IMPEDIMENTS TO COUPLEHOOD
I think it's great that Singov wants to educate high school kids on relationship management. Like our parents and their parents, we all like to think that some things in life will come naturally. Like how to get a partner, want to have children, how to be a parent etc.

On contrary, I believe that the only natural instinct is to fuck. Getting a partner to to facilitate fucking, having the kid(s) is merely an inevitable consequence of happy fuckings. And I've heard that for some even something so 'natural' doesn't come instinctively, needing pointers from experts when they have absolutely no physiological problems. Hence we cannot assume that all life's matters come 'naturally' eh?! For example, marriage and parenting have become so complex these days because the expectations of what makes a good spouse and parent have risen like nobody's business when it's really most people's business. Ok, I'm a little corny today.

You know, research tends to point towards the fact that once you educate the female half of the population, you fuck up the 'natural' balance of ever-increasing birth rates. That is merely one side of the story. I think education makes both genders think and want a 'meaningful' relationship. And what's 'meaningful' is highly subjective, but all the same difficult to achieve. I believe there are the following generic baskets of people and their attendant values. These categories are permeable, i.e. one could be a combination of more than 1 boxes. Yeah... Think about the endless nuanced category-possibilities.

	The Familial Enthusiasts - Ritualistic & takes comfort in the family structure	The Yuppies - Primarily concerned with appearances, brands & material comforts	The Intellectuals - In pursuit of the superior 'truth(s)'
Straight	S1 (50%)	S2 (40%)	S3 (10%)
Gay	G1 (30%)	G2 (60%)	G3 (10%)

I believe Singov is targeting the Straights. And the dynamics of each group are the obstacles.

Assuming, it takes similar goals to achieve a long-lasting relationship, this means, e.g. S2 ought to pair with S2. However, S2s may be too obsessed with themselves to want to have children.

Perhaps the couple is a combination of S1 + S2, then they will scale back on the number of children and/or delay having them as being partly S2 places a certain demand on their consumption power.

While an S1 + S3 individual will be very happy to ignore the materials and uber keen to look for a fertile mate with similar intellectual prowess, the latter criteria also acts as a huge hindrance.

A S1 + S2 + S3 is the deadliest of all. Finding a mate is the greatest challenge. Too many criteria to fulfill.

Seriously, with your hand on your heart, how many of us, Gen X, and worst still, Gen Y, are S1s?!! With a TFR of 1.4+, it just means that 1 out of 2 women in their fertile age are having 2+ children.

I personally believe, it is currently 'in' to be S2, and increasingly cool to be 'S3'. It will come to a point where it's best to be S2 + S3. While the S1 spirit will always be there, supported by religion and familial norms, these are merely institutional and are unlikely to be shiner than that perfect Hollywood lifestyle of glitz and glam childlessness. Hollywood parents make way too much for us to emulate. It's easier to emulate the perfect wedding and stop there.

All the more I applaud Singov for attempting to enlighten high schoolers on relationships and how to manage them. I just worry about the kind of endorsed 'right values' to be transfered during the course. If dating requires training, I'm sure parenting is even more complex. Back to my earlier Parenting Licence argument, or minimally, so kind of self-help course to cope with the complexity of modern life.

It seems lengthy entries result in people missing the point. It seems there is an inability to differentiate between of 'the individual' vs 'the nation'. Hence, let's do simple entries instead.

'Good Fren' noticed that Tiger likes this basket...


While Blinky likes this one...


'Good Fren' thinks it's their instinct to choose a napping spot that is close to their own coat colour.

I don't think so leh... I see them in both baskets at different times. Does your cat attempt to camouflage itself?

'Good Fren' and I had some new friends over this afternoon. After that, we watched the table tennis game. Yeah... On my birthday... Not because we think that World #6, 7 and 9 will beat World #1, 2 and 5, but because 'Good Fren' enjoys watching table tennis. *shrugz* I dun get racket games. I'll take basketball and handball anytime. =)

MEDAL BUYING IS GOOD FOR THE PLAYERS

So we got an Olympic Silver Medal with 2 out of the 3 players bought off the Chinese shelf within the past year(s). Dun scoff at it. I think this buying game is good for the players. With these transactions, the 2nd tier players from the same source get a chance to compete. Reshuffling of opportunities.

MEDAL BUYING IS MEANINGLESS TO THE NATION

But I'm not sure if this is at all meaningful to the nation.
Coz even when someone has been training under the Singapore Flag for the past decade, it may just be a smart way to get that opportunity to compete, rather than an attempt to truly becoming a citizen.

Li Jia Wei has been training under the Singapore Flag since 1996 and has represented Singapore for the 3 Olympics. If you watch this video, especially at 26:35 when Li unabashedly says on Chinese national TV that she is a Beijing-er and Chinese (she used the term ‘中国人’, and not '华人'), you will realise that all those years in Singapore + change in citizenship doesn't make her Singaporean.

“希望在2008， 我自己又是一个北京人，又是中国人，我希望能在自己的本土，怎么说呢，自己的地盘上能够取得一面奖牌。” - Li Jia Wei

Judging from the date stamp, the interview program was aired recently and on or before 4 Jul 2008. (Video linked sourced via Tomorrow.sg)

As a Singaporean, I state here that I feel silly about having won an Olympic medal in this manner. It's as if we are groveling for a medal. I will not feel less if Singapore did not win anything at the Olympics.

It seems some players choose to play for Singapore as if it was 'Club Singapore', and not 'Country Singapore'. Brings the term 'Country Club' to a whole new level, doesn't it?

(Btw, I think Feng Tian Wei's story is really sobering. One really needs to have talent, passion and hunger to excel. Contrast that with what the Coach said about Li Jia Wei's lowest point in her career, i.e. she had become materially comfortable and lost her fighting spirit.

Feng's story and Li's father highlight the usefulness of player-buying for the individual. In Mr Li's words, it is a shortcut for the players to compete in major competitions.)

IF WE HAVE TO BUY, WHY STOP AT PLAYERS?

Anyway, since we are at it, perhaps we should have bought the swimming formula from the Australian coach for Tao Li. Some SSC officer ought to do some market research and come up with the Cost-Benefit-Analysis.

FWAH...

A reader pointed out to me that someone copied my earlier entry on Jade Seah Says FUCK word-for-word, used the same picture which I took of our TV, and conveniently left out the 'Good Fren' bit.

I guess that blog owner is hoping for some blog traffic as that entry has been rather popular.

Here you go. I've linked you for even more traffic.
Next time just ask, ok? No need to take surreptitiously.
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Update on 18 Aug 2008: I think the blog has been deleted?!

Hello Everyone...

If you have been watching Channel 5, they have stopped using the Singlish-accented English dubs for the former-PRC-turned-Singaporean players.

And Jade Seah hasn't said it again since.
Oh come on... We like Jade Seah, ok!! She's very Singaporean Lian. Cute what! You should catch that episode of the no meaning beach volleyball drama where her team lost a game and had to fulfill a penalty, i.e. to strip to their bikinis and shop for stuff in Tiong Bahru Market in a hurry. (Yeah... It's a no meaning beach volleyball drama.) She was damn cute lor... Everyone in her team had to buy a specific item by drawing lots. She drew something yucky, I think. And when another team mate drew 'chrysanthemum', Jade Seah rolled her eyes and said,
Funny what!!

Anyway, a new Singaporean Sports Star has risen.
And if I were 15 years younger, I would have a crush on Feng Tian Wei.

This chick excels under pressure.
Maybe she should have been our flag bearer instead.

Btw, WTF is he talking about? Fudged and missed.
Thought STTA already publicly announced in Feb 08 that Feng Tian Wei was the new spark?

I heard the Team would get SGD1million if they get the Gold.
What about the Silver? SGD500k?
Will that go 3 ways? What about the coach?

If it goes 3 ways, that's around SGD167k each.
That's a lot of LV and Gucci bags eh? =P

On a somewhat related issue, if one day our imported players become unbeatable World No.1s, is it a problem if they change citizenships again?

It seems the Olympic Charter requires the player to be a citizen of the country for at least 3 years before he can represent that country. See Bye-Law to Rule 42 as highlighted below:


Does this technically mean that a player can be representing Country X in Olympics 2008, then switch citizenships within a year later, and represent Country Y in Olympics 2012?
I wonder whether the player can then choose to switch back to Country X in Olympics 2016, assuming his/her physical condition still holds.
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* Ok, in simple terms, what I was hoping that by reading the above, people would be wondering about the following:

(A) If there is nothing in the Olympics Charter that stops a player from representing different countries at the Olympics, it technically means a player can represent multiple countries in his sporting career.

(B) If (A) is true, isn't it intuitive to contemplate the possibility of other countries poaching our top players?

(C) And whether it is possible for our top players can be woo-ed BACK by their country of birth? If we wanna prevent (C) from taking place, whether it means we have to provide more/better terms/conditions for our top players in terms of pay, benefits etc?

The principle of concern is similar to the poaching of talented employees by corporations.

The kid on the right is deemed prettier than the kid on the left.

I had to blog about this lor...

'Good Fren' and I were watching the Channel 5 Nightly LIVE Olympics Report tonight, when we thought we heard Jade Seah saying,


after she introduced the Men's Synchro Diving, and when the images of the Basketball images come on. Mark Richmond attempted a ha-ha comeback after that.

I think this pair is hilarious. Choppy at times and uber corny, I think it's real fun to watch them nightly.

Another reason to watch the nightly updates:
Whenever a former-PRC-now-Singaporean player speaks in Mandarin when interviewed, she gets dubbed in Singlish-accented English.
Not Singlish...mind you... But clearly Singlish-accented English.
It's HILARIOUS!!!

~ Guy who loves everything English, wishes he was white, and thinks that 火腿 comes from 火鸡

~ ACS Gynaecologist trying to convince his patient of the merits of breastfeeding.

You see the bunch of SGD10 notes?
They have been laundered. Waiting to be pressed.

BM: *hanging up wet laundry and noticing a wad of wet notes on the washing drum rim* BABY!!! Did you leave some notes in your pocket?!!

GF: FWAH BABY! OUR WASHING MACHINE MAKES MONEY!!

BM: ROOOAAAAAARRRRRR!!!

How many of you caught the China vs Redeem Team game?

They did.


We did.

And I support the Redeem Team. WOO HOOOOOOOO!!!

The Americans play with such finesse and athleticism. They played 钉人 the entire time lor!!
I also love the dunks. They just kept putting it in the basket again and again and again!!

I haven't been watching NBA for the longest time now. I dunno who's who anymore. But because of that game, this guy caught my eye. Of course, he was wearing his Olympics garb. =))


I know Lebron, Dwayne etc are really skilled, but it was Howard Dwight who caught my attention because his deltoids are as huge as his head. =)))


His delts are so huge that he looks like he had rugby shoulder pads. Makes him a great centre. Takes up a lot of space standing anywhere. =)))

In fact, it's kind of weird to watch the Chinese players amidst the Redeem Team, coz the former was significantly skinnier and tired out much more quickly.

Someone sent me this.
Dabbawallah sounds like a Star Wars term.

Incidentally, since many of us do not make our own food/clothes/chair/house in this age of Division of Labour, I was attempting to understand the act of decision-making continues to enable a sense of self.

E.g. Though I do not make my own clothes, the act of shopping for (choosing) certain type of clothes defines my style and directly defines 'me'.

What I don't fully comprehend is that the so-called choices are limited. Fashion may not be a good example for illustration because there are simply too many items of adornments to be placed on the body. So, let's just go for the largest item, i.e. housing. This flat/apartment/house vs another. They are, in general, similar. So what makes us different? Individuals?

Or perhaps it's all in the 'details', e.g. the colour of the fridge you choose to slot in the fridge bracket, the brand of mattress in the small bedroom, the colour of the walls etc? Whether there is more or less lace on the off-white wedding gown?

We want to be different/special in small ways, but yet the same in the general manner. Is this the only definition of 'individual'?

Both chicks were seeking distractions from other pains in their lives, e.g. family, breakup etc.

Both guys wrote poems, then proclaimed,"I'm never going to do this again. It's too painful."

(Now before you get all excited about the gender reactions... I think that even if the roles were reversed, the reactions would have been largely similar.)

Now, here comes the difference.
One set of them was honest. Both Chick and Guy were honest (and lonely + confused) people. Amongst other stuff, the other set wasn't exactly forthcoming.

The presence/absence of honesty resulted in a different outcome in terms of termination. The honest set's relationship didn't end in acrimony. Nobody felt cheated. No finger pointing.

To be honest, I'm rather impressed by the Honest Chick. I think she handled the situation rather well. Put the break up across to the Honest Guy in a respectable manner. I guess it helps that the Honest Guy is who he is. Virtuous Cycle.

On the other side of the relationship arena, you witness a Vicious Cycle of finger-pointing, accusations and yucky spillover effects onto others.

I guess age has nothing to do with a good/bad breakup. While honesty does not guarantee successful relationships, it will help to shorten the healing process.

[Play this while you read the entry]


Somehow, 'Good Fren' and I have been sharing with people quite a bit lately. About our past, our present and our plans.

The thing about sharing, like all activities, is that practice makes perfect. The more we share, the more we know what people are interested in and are trying find out. Also, in the process, we become better at sharing. We develop tools to facilitate sharing.

THE SHARING TOOL

For example, the other day, a friend was sharing with me how he has met someone after a long while. To help him to maintain some kind of sanity amidst the rush of hormones and other chemical reactions in his hyperactive brain, I suggested for him to make a list of what he wants in life, then at an appropriate moment, to share it with the chick.

The objective is really to coax him to rationalise his expectations. Sometimes we think we know what we want. These goals are floating around in our consciousness without clear implementation plans. And sometimes, the goals contradict one another. Hence, translating them into words helps with de-confliction and clarification.

THE LIFE LIST

You see, I merely mentioned the list-making without giving details, and my friend stayed up that night and made a list with the following categories/spheres:

• Work
• Family
• Friends
• Finances
• Hobbies
• Spirituality

I never suggested any templates, but it inspired a wonderful piece of self-reflection. He then emailed it to me. And asked me for mine. I thought about it and realised that my category was not gonna be similar to his.

The Life List, for some, is a to-do list of specific tasks.

My Life List is more like a mission statement. I have only 1 objective/principle, i.e. to experience as much as possible and within the limits of being useful to someone/some entity beyond myself. The limits are very important. Durkheim is right. We need rules in order to be truly free.

I believe that such a Life List format is more pragmatic. Because the activities I eventually engage in are merely forms. They are merely vehicles of the substance. And the substance is in the principle.

(My friend was quite keen on starting a meme with the Life List. That's a thought. But I think it's more important for the individual to want to do it from his gut. So if you think the Life List will help you, just draft/review one while on the MRT, the bus, at lunch etc.)

SHARING THE LIFE LIST

I think it's very basic and crucial to share one's Life List with the potential partner. I know some may see this as common sense, but many people fail to carry it out properly. Some find it difficult to work out their Life Lists. Without the list, how is it possible to share with another? Without sharing, how is possible to start/create a life/lives together? The pre-requisite of making a good Life List is to be honest. With oneself, with the partner, and whoever is part of one's life.

And yes, it's true that life becomes more complicated as one allows more people to be involved in one's life. This Life List exercise is also a reminder that one's capacity is limited. That at some point, one needs to learn to cut out certain people, expectations, dreams, crap etc, to keep the list real.

THE BBQ LIFE SUBSTITUTE

On a somewhat related note, an epiphany hit me this afternoon. That in this expensive and complex era, we go about our lives by leveraging on the community. E.g. Weddings. Few people pay for the entire wedding dinner on their own. Couples/families do not throw a huge feast party and invite their guests without expectations of angpows/gifts. In essence, it's a kind of community borrowing. I wanna get married now, you help me first. When it's your turn, I'll pay you back. Same for the bottle of wine you bring to someone's BBQ Life party. Same principle which Minister Wong is trying to get at for the rejuvenated baby-making effort.

Now, if we could scrap the useless weddings, chiffon and flowers, but focus on sharing our Life List every time we gather with our circle of friends, imagine how much richer you will walk away from every gathering. Of course, that assumes that everyone comes prepared with their well thought through Life List. But that's just a habit like the ang pow, isn't it?

We are hoping that this will be the start of a humble movement that is beyond the material crap which many of us have been devoting our weekends to for the past decades.

We do accept that we may lose some friends as they feel the pressure to share their Life List when gathering with us. =)))

I know I should continue the Noise Pollution entry but something else has gotten in the way.

I'm at home with a rash.

Apparently, I got allergic to something but I dunno what. The doc gave me some steroids to help with the rash, but I have to figure out what's causing the allergy on my own. I figured it's either the juice drink I've started on recently, or stress. Stress is the best factor to put the blame on for all your itching problems. In fact, stress (from any source) should be the #1 Public Enemy, second to nothing else but Mother Nature's wrath. And I refuse to even explore the possibility that it could be Blinky and/or Tiger. Tamade. They probably exacerbate but do not cause the situation.

I think the rash must be quite gross coz whenever I try to make 'Good Fren' touch it, he runs away. HAHA!!

I used to get rashes a lot when I was little. Coz I am allergic to grass.

I must say the steroids do work. The rash is less itchy today. It's worth every milligram of its shitty bitterness. Yucks.

But now, I can't take part in the Olympics Games anymore.
Geddit? Geddit? =)))
...................................................

On a totally unrelated note, I like the word "BIATCH".

I think it's a really bitchy way of saying 'bitch'.
Makes it doubly bitchy, I guess.

And the weird bit is that I was introduced to this word by a guy. A straight guy. And so far, I've only heard males using it. I think guys find the word amusing. Using it on someone else affirms their manliness or something.

Ok, that's all for this entry.
I'm gonna anticipate the steroids' kick.
Like the doctor said,"You will feel a sense of well-being."
WOO HOOOOOOOO....

Sometime ago, I read 2 letters published in the papers. The first was written by a foreigner who shifted out of Singapore because he couldn't stand the noise from nearby construction works, and it was affecting his business (he has a home office). The second was a response from the National Environmental Agency (NEA) stating their guidelines on the noises and attendant levels from work sites.

This week, I read about the lady who killed herself after being released on bail because she had just stabbed her neighbour in an argument over the neighbour's night-time mahjong sessions. Just a couple of weeks earlier, there was a separate report on a HDB neighbour who played mahjong non-stop for 3 days/nights. No amount of talking by resident, poilcemen, HDB etc can help the situation. The resident wants to move out but is unable to because of housing policy restrictions.

I remember going to Sin Hoi San at the Tiong Bahru Estate for supper, and witnessing a resident shouting at the restuarant from her flat. She sounded really frustrated, to the point of getting crazy. She could hear the bowls hitting against one another while being washed at the back lane. I'm sure the customers talk loudly at times too. To make matters worse, this eating establishment is a popular supper spot, operating beyond midnight. So popular that it sponsors Mayday concerts.


Before the construction site next door completed its activities, I slept with earplugs every night. While I have always had air-conditioning, I wonder how families who cannot afford it manage in such situations. You simply cannot open your windows because of the noise and dust. And these days, in order to squeeze more on any plot of land, buildings are built to the max on site laterally and vertically. This means, the next building under construction is very very close to yours. Even if NEA says no use of XYZ machinery after 11pm, it doesn't stop workers from shoveling debris from the ground and throwing it into containers, hammering, shouting etc. If you stay on the 2nd floor, the noise source can be as close as 15m away from your ears.

We have identified 3 different noise sources, i.e from (1) Construction sites, (2) Neighbours and (3) Businesses, which can potentially be operating 24-7. All 3 can affect your home.

We shall continue this discussion in the next entry.

'Good Fren' and I went for a haircut this afternoon.
The weird bit is that I finally got Jonathan to chop about 15 cm off. This must be the shortest ever in 10 years.

I blame the scorching summer sun.

Now I feel light-headed.

I can't even remember the last time I was at Zouk. On Thursday, I decided to ask my Gay Bud (GB) whether we should go to Zouk for the heck of it. And also to collect the card.

On Friday noon, I messaged him:

BM: Oi... Wanna go for lunch?
GB: Cannot. I'm going for a haircut at lunch time. So that I'd look lovely tonight.
BM: WAHAHAHAHAHAH!! You win oredi lor!! ... Actually, while I was getting ready for work this morning, I wondered about what I was supposed to wear to Zouk. What do people wear to Zouk these days?
GB: All my chiong clothes cannot fit anymore because I am fat.
BM: 2 fatties going to Zouk tonight!!! WOO HOO!!!

Friday night, around 10pm, he knocked on our door. We burst out laughing after I opened the door. We were wearing the same outfit, i.e. slightly funky polo-T-shirt and jeans. =)))

After 'Good Fren' dropped us at Zouk, we walked into a very clear Wine Bar, i.e. one could see everyone else's face. Too clear to be exact. In most cases, definition is not necessary. A little vagueness creates space for magic...

After some wine, we took a tour. Went to Velvet. Nope. Not many people around.

Went to Zouk. Some Monsoon hairshow was going on. We stood at Members' Bar for like 10 minutes, trying to decide what to order. Ended up with 2 jugs of vodka cranberry?!
Subsequently, I saw some kid ordering a couple glasses of what looked like slush. I think I will try that the next time. Problem is I dunno what its name is.

Apart from a couple of familiar faces amongst the staff, I saw 1 person whom I knew. Just 1. I didn't even bother to say hi coz he has been trying to be one of those "I'm so cool" people since I knew him in my 20s.

When the techno came on, we danced in the only way we know how to. What's weird was that no one else was dancing in Members'. So we went downstairs to the steps in front the main bar, i.e. otherwise known as the gay spot. Nope. Not gay at all last night.

Got 'Good Fren' to pick us up around 1.30am. I was surprised we lasted that long. =))

I think we have aged.
These days, we prefer to a long chat over some wine and food.

I finally watched Beijing Rocks.

I think it's a sad sad film. =(((

My experience with 'creative/music' people has been really really lousy so far. The film makes my skin creep. *shudders*

I love the bit where the musician dies a pauper while the ah siah giah gets off the hook for assault at a pub because his rich dad sucked up to power. I think I have come a point where the difference between impotent angst and injustice is very clear.
.....................................

Somehow Beijing Rocks reminded me of 蓝宇.

This film is tragically memorable, not because of the gay theme, but because of love squandered.

And somehow, the creative types are usually more 'explosive' with their emotions. Some would like to account this under 'their brains are wired differently'. That's too easy.

I like to think that 'creative types' are obsessed with aesthetics. Hence, even pain must be suffered in an aesthetically pleasing manner.